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Mortuary Confidential
Author: Kenneth McKenzie, Todd Harra
Publisher: Kensington Books
ISBN: 0806531797
Pages: 234
Year: 2010
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Read: 937
From rookie mistakes and runaway corpses to screaming dead men and unusual requests, a collection of stories by funeral directors.
Mortician Diaries
Author: June Knights Nadle
Publisher: New World Library
ISBN: 1577318579
Pages: 152
Year: 2010-10-04
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After 50 years in the funeral business, 80-year-old grandmother-undertaker June Knights Nadle has seen it all — at least all of what goes on before, during, and after life’s ultimate challenge. In Mortician Diaries, she combines equal doses of charm, humanity, humor, and reality to tell it like it is on this taboo subject. A kind of Prairie Home Companion set in a mortuary, the book features memorable stories of regret — “I wish I had kissed him on the morning he had the accident” — and renewal, as the lesson of facing life’s last great event is learned, or not. Some of the accounts here are funny, some sad. Some are haunting in their strangeness as they reveal the many ways in which people cope. Along the way, the reader is drawn into Nadle’s own life story as an unconventional woman who devoted herself to the dead and to those they left behind.
Does This Mean You'll See Me Naked?
Author: Robert D. Webster
Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.
ISBN: 1402250835
Pages: 240
Year: 2011-04-26
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With curious anecdotes and unbelievable truths, funeral director and embalmer Webster shares empathetic yet entertainingly quirky stories about the funeral business. He answers those embarrassing questions foremost in people's minds and provides readers with behind-the scenes stories of what really goes on after one dies.
Undertaker Tales: What They Don't Teach You at Mortuary School
Author: Norgus Press
Publisher: Norgus Press
ISBN: 0615545823
Pages: 184
Year: 2011-10-01
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The Undertaker. After you have breathed your final breath the Undertaker prepares your body for the afterlife. They carry the burden of making you at ease in your new home for all eternity. The stories these brave men and women could tell! We have gathered but a few for you today in these pages. UNDERTAKER TALES IS A FICTIONAL ANTHOLOGY OF HORROR STORIES.
The Removers
Author: Andrew Meredith
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1476761248
Pages: 192
Year: 2014-07-15
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“A darkly funny memoir about family reckonings” (O, The Oprah Magazine)—the story of a young man who, by handling the dead, makes peace with the living. Andrew Meredith’s father, a literature professor at La Salle University, was fired after unspecified allegations of sexual misconduct. It’s a transgression that resulted in such long-lasting familial despair that Andrew cannot forgive him. In the wake of the scandal, he frantically treads water, stuck in a kind of suspended adolescence—falling in and out of school, moving blindly from one half-hearted relationship to the next. When Andrew is forced to move back home to his childhood neighborhood in Northeast Philadelphia and take a job alongside his father as a “remover,” the name for those unseen, unsung men whose charge it is to take away the dead from their last rooms, he begins to see his father not through the lens of a wronged and resentful child, but through that of a sympathetic, imperfect man. Called “artful” and “compelling” by Thomas Lynch in The Wall Street Journal, Meredith’s poetic voice is as unforgettable as his story, and “he tucks his bittersweet childhood memories between tales of removals as carefully as the death certificates he slips between the bodies he picks up and the stretcher-like contraption that transports each body to the waiting vehicle” (Minneapolis Star-Tribune). “Potent” (Publishers Weekly), and “ultimately rewarding” (The Boston Globe), The Removers is a searing, coming-of-age memoir with “lyrical language and strong sense of place” (The Philadelphia Inquirer).
Good Mourning
Author: Elizabeth Meyer
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1476783659
Pages: 288
Year: 2015-08-25
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Elizabeth Meyer’s “sweet, touching, and funny” (Booklist) memoir reads as if “Carrie Bradshaw worked in a funeral home a la Six Feet Under” (Publishers Weekly, starred review). Good Mourning offers a behind-the-scenes look at a legendary funeral chapel on New York City’s Upper East Side—mixing big money, society drama, and the universal experience of grieving—told from the unique perspective of a fashionista turned funeral planner. Elizabeth Meyer stumbled upon a career in the midst of planning her own father’s funeral, which she turned into an upbeat party with Rolling Stones music, thousands of dollars worth of her mother’s favorite flowers, and a personalized eulogy. Starting as a receptionist, Meyer quickly found she had a knack for helping people cope with their grief, as well as creating fitting send-offs for some of the city’s most high-powered residents. Meyer has seen it all: two women who found out their deceased husband (yes, singular) was living a double life, a famous corpse with a missing brain, and funerals that cost more than most weddings. By turns illuminating, emotional, and darkly humorous, Good Mourning is a lesson in how the human heart grieves and grows—whether you’re wearing this season’s couture or drug-store flip-flops.
The Chick and the Dead
Author: Carla Valentine
Publisher: Macmillan
ISBN: 1250120691
Pages: 272
Year: 2017-06-13
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Carla Valentine works with the dead. After studying forensics, she assisted pathologists with post-mortems for years before becoming the curator of the world’s most famous pathology museum. When it comes to death, she truly is an expert, and in this book she shares that expertise. Using the most common post-mortem process as the backbone of the narrative, The Chick and the Dead takes the reader through the process of an autopsy while also describing the history and changing cultures of our relationship with the dead. The book is full of vivid insight into what happens to our bodies in the end. Each chapter considers an aspect of an autopsy alongside an aspect of Carla’s own life and work and touches on some of the more controversial aspects of our feelings towards death, including the relationship between sex and death and our attitudes toward human tissue collection. Starting with the first cut, we move from external examination into the body itself, discovering more about the heart, stomach and brain, and into dismembered and reconstructed bodies, at each stage taking a colorful detour into the question of what these things can teach us about the living. Join Carla on the journey from microscope-requesting nine-year-old to pathology educator and death engager at a Victorian museum (a journey made via around 5,000 autopsies) as she tells the story of exactly what it’s like to live a life immersed in death.
And Then I Cried
Author: Justin Jordan
ISBN: 0985558245
Pages: 126
Year: 2012-07-13
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Jordan details life as an Air Force Mortuary Non Commissioned Officer. He holds nothing back, and shares in graphic detail how he honored Americas heroes, both at deployed locations and stateside.
Nine Years Under
Author: Sheri Booker
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 1592407625
Pages: 261
Year: 2014
View: 272
Read: 704
A dazzling and darkly comic memoir about coming of age in a black funeral home in Baltimore Sheri Booker was only fifteen when she started working at Wylie Funeral Home in West Baltimore. She had no idea her summer job would become nine years of immersion into a hidden world. Reeling from the death of her beloved great aunt, Sheri found comfort in the funeral home and soon had the run of the place. With AIDS and gang violence threatening to wipe out a generation of black men, Wylie was never short on business. As families came together to bury one of their own, Booker was privy to their most intimate moments of grief and despair. But along with the sadness, Booker encountered moments of dark humor: brawls between mistresses and widows, and car crashes at McDonald's with dead bodies in tow. While she never got over her terror of the embalming room, Booker learned to expect the unexpected and to never, ever cry. Nine Years Under offers readers an unbelievable glimpse into an industry in the backdrop of all our lives.
The Mortician's Apprentice
Author: Richard L. Perez
Publisher: CreateSpace
ISBN: 1484994035
Pages: 108
Year: 2014-06-21
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There has always been a "mystique" concerning the mysteries surrounding death - especially those activities regarding the functions of those who become responsible for the examination, treatment and disposition of the dead body. The study of such matters is called "Thanatology." This book reveals the life of a person who, from a very young age, has experienced various facets of the death process including, autopsies and mortuary operations. This is an eye-opening treatise on the various activities which surround the processing of a human body for its final disposition: this book includes, the description of the normal Autopsy (done by regular pathologists who seek to learn more about disease) as well as the Forensic Autopsy (regarding deaths from unnatural causes such as suicide, homicide accidental, etc. causes) performed by a Medical Examiner's examiner. The book further enters into the world of the mortician and the aspects of body management he/she must perform. There is also a discussion about various religious rituals which are the con-cern of the Funeral Director who must plan a proper service or memorial. Body preparation is a major aspect of the morticians's work - the book will describe the step-by-step process of this function and a discussion regarding caskets, cremation, urns a cemeteries and the various types of final disposition types is included. This book is suitable for anyone considering a career in an aspect of thanatology or for anyone who has had the curiosity as to what actually happens behind those closed doors. It also serves as a starting point for further discussion on death and dying. It is an attempt to 'unlock' the mysteries of the death "business" to help us to better understand and accept the fact that we are faced with the possibility of death regarding our family loved ones, friends, and even ourselves. It reminds us of our own mortality and how we will prepare for the inevitable. It is also a reminder that we can anticipate our own death and realize that there are people trained to care for our physical bodies and also a reminder that we should also prepare for our spiritual departure. The last chapter of this book relates a different aspect of work in the mortuary. Yes, as in any occupation, there are humorous things which occur while working in this serious business. The book closes with a sequence of humorous stories surrounding the work of the author during his tenure in the thanatology business. These stories are true as they occurred with the author, but, it is certain, other people in this business can also relate humorous stories from their experiences..
Funerals to Die For
Author: Kathy Benjamin
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 144055708X
Pages: 256
Year: 2013-03-18
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True stories that put the, er, "fun" back into funerals! The hereafter may still be part of the great unknown, but with Funerals to Die For you can unearth the rich--and often, dark--history of funeral rites. From getting a portrait painted with a loved one's ashes to purchasing a safety coffin complete with bells and breathing tubes, this book takes you on a whirlwind tour of funeral customs and trivia from all over the globe. Inside, you'll find more than 100 unbelievable traditions, practices, and facts, such as: The remains of a loved one can be launched into deep space for only $1,000. In Taiwan, strippers are hired to entertain funeral guests throughout the ceremony. Undertakers for the Tongan royal family weren't allowed to use their hands for 100 days after preparing a king's body. In the late 1800s, New Englanders would gulp down a cocktail of water and their family member's ashes in order to keep them from returning as vampires. Whether you fear being buried alive or just have a morbid curiosity of the other side, Funerals to Die For examines what may happen when another person dies.
Confessions of a Funeral Director
Author: Caleb Wilde
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 0062465260
Pages: 208
Year: 2017-09-26
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The blogger behind Confessions of a Funeral Director—what Time magazine called a "must read"—reflects on mortality and the powerful lessons death holds for every one of us in this compassionate and thoughtful spiritual memoir that combines the humor and insight of Smoke Gets in Your Eyes with the poignancy and brevity of When Breath Becomes Air. We are a people who deeply fear death. While humans are biologically wired to evade death for as long as possible, we have become too adept at hiding from it, vilifying it, and—when it can be avoided no longer—letting the professionals take over. Sixth-generation funeral director Caleb Wilde understands this reticence and fear. He had planned to get as far away from the family business as possible. He wanted to make a difference in the world, and how could he do that if all the people he worked with were . . . dead? Slowly, he discovered that caring for the deceased and their loved ones was making a difference—in other people’s lives to be sure, but it also seemed to be saving his own. A spirituality of death began to emerge as he observed: The family who lovingly dressed their deceased father for his burial The act of embalming a little girl that offered a gift back to her grieving family The nursing home that honored a woman’s life by standing in procession as her body was taken away The funeral that united a conflicted community Through stories like these, told with equal parts humor and poignancy, Wilde offers an intimate look into the business and a new perspective on living and dying
Confessions of Emergency Room Doctors
Author: Rocky Lang
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 0740789600
Pages: 208
Year: 2009-01-01
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Rocky Lang and Dr. Erick Montero offer up more than 200 firsthand accounts of emergency room dramas along with bizarre and insightful medical facts and stats inside Confessions of Emergency Room Doctors. Sample entries include: * Strange Disease Fact: A melcryptovestimentaphilliac is someone who compulsively steals ladies underwear. * Dr. Brown, Chicago Hospital, writes: "A woman came into the ER, ready to give birth, followed by her husband and about ten kids. Their last name was King. We took her to the operating room and soon I came out and announced that he was the proud father of a baby boy--I told him his wife said that he should name the little one. Mr. King scratched his head and said, "Gee I just don't know, I've just about used up all the names I can think of." He glanced up at a sign that read, "No Smoking." "That's it," he says, "I'll name him Nosmo--Nosmo King."
Author: Dr. Vincent Di Maio, Ron Franscell
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
ISBN: 1466875062
Pages: 320
Year: 2016-05-17
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In this clear-eyed, gritty, and enthralling narrative, Dr. Vincent DiMaio and veteran crime writer Ron Franscell guide us behind the morgue doors to tell a fascinating life story through the cases that have made DiMaio famous-from the exhumation of assassin Lee Harvey Oswald to the complex issues in the shooting of Florida teenager Trayvon Martin. Beginning with his street-smart Italian origins in Brooklyn, the book spans 40 years of work and more than 9,000 autopsies, and DiMaio's eventual rise into the pantheon of forensic scientists. One of the country's most methodical and intuitive criminal pathologists will dissect himself, maintaining a nearly continuous flow of suspenseful stories, revealing anecdotes, and enough macabre insider details to rivet the most fervent crime fans.
Pardon My Hearse
Author: Allan Abbott, Greg Abbott
Publisher: Craven Street Books
ISBN: 1610352483
Pages: 250
Year: 2015-06-15
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Even celebrities die—and he was the man who picked up the bodies! Allan Abbott ran the leading hearse, mortuary, and funeral services company in Hollywood and got an unprecedented glimpse of how celebrities really live and die. The Forrest Gump of the funeral industry, Abbott was everywhere celebrities died, from helping to prepare Marilyn Monroe's body for burial to standing next to Christopher Walken at Natalie Wood's funeral. Now in his memoir “Pardon My Hearse,” Abbott tells the rags-to-shroud story of how we went from a young man with a hearse to the funeral driver to the stars—a rollicking, unexpectedly hilarious story of glamorous funerals, mishaps with corpses, and true-life glimpses of celebrities at their most revealing moments. ”Pardon My Hearse” is an eye-opening look at secret Hollywood from the man who literally knows where the bodies are buried.

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